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2 posts from June 2006

June 18, 2006

Tribute to the Dads that support Mommy Bloggers

Originally posted to the Silicon Valley Moms Blog

Happy Father's Day, especially to those dads who support mommy bloggers.  Pamela's husband dealt with a tantrum so she could blog today. Mine  was at Best Buy getting the CD player in my car fixed so I could listen to my new cool CD's (including the Red Hot Chili Peppers).  That also gave me the time to post while my twins were napping.

These dads and other's like them value spending time with their kids (which they do more of because they are married to mommy bloggers). They also value their wives enough to support them while they pursue a personal passion. I know many other moms who are also pursuing their personal passions; whether it is work, volunteer, or hobbies. It is great to hear stories of their husbands, family, or partners who also provide support.  This support is essential, especially for moms, so they have that extra time to devote to outside interests. From my own experience and feedback from friends, this extra time helps moms feel balanced. Because my husband and I both blog (his blog is behind his companies firewall), it is also an interest we can share. OK, I can be sappy since it only happens once a year on fathers day.

So dads with blogging wives: thank you for your support, for your willingness to work as a team, for helping edit some posts even when you are tired from a full day of work, for not making us feel bad about the laundry piling up, for training with us for half marathons, for making us laugh and giving us great experiences to write about, for being the plus one at the BlogHer cocktail party, and most of all for being great dads and husbands.

Here is a Silicon Valley (high tech) Father's Day Card to all of you. As Mir from WCS said "Dads, we dig you" . Or as Cape Buffalo said "Dads Rock ".

June 08, 2006

Blogging Etiquette and Intimacy

Originally published on the Silicon Valley Moms Blog

My husband and I went out to a party tonight and had the chance to see some wonderful friends from the past. The conversation became interesting as the husbands were discussing how they feel ignored at night after the kids go to sleep because their wives are using the computer for some sort of volunteer work; PTA, non-profit, blogging or in my case all of them. The old term used by wives that don't see their husbands because they work so much was "work widows". But here in Silicon Valley, the term used by husbands whose wives are always working on the computer is "computer widowers".

The larger questions is: What is the proper etiquette for time spent after the kids go to sleep? Is it time for computer use or time for intimacy? Every parent knows that other then spending precious time with your children, the next most precious time of the day is after the kids go to sleep. That time in elementary school terms is called "free choice time". Yet, if you add in the second shift chores of cleaning up and preparing lunches for school the next day, free choice time is really only one hour per night. Many Silicon Valley moms have some sort of volunteer commitments. This means that the precious one hour of time left at night can easily get absorbed with computer or some sort of paperwork. Maybe blogging or general volunteer guidelines should state that "all computers, paper folders, and other busywork should be shut down one hour before bed to spend time with your spouse". I will be the first to officially adopt that rule, so it is time to shut off my computer and spend some precious time with my spouse.

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